Ah, the holiday season, the start of winter’s deep freeze…

…Though from where I’m typing it’s 70 degrees (damn you, global warming!!)

It’s now that I’m thankful of everything I’ve got

(And I ask Santa for everything else I have not)

And for you, fellow reader, I have a small gift,

A review that’s humorous, tidy, and swift.

So what can I review in a cinch or a pinch? How about…

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I was gonna say Charlie Brown, but meh, he’ll do.

The Grinch hates Christmas

The whole holiday season

(Please disregard the movie

It gives him a dumb reason).

The Grinch glowers from his cave

At all of the Whos

Whom every Christmas

They bother to choose

To fill the air with joyous noise

Of singing and laughter from

The girls and the boys

The presents, the laughter,

The singing too

Makes a Christmas like theirs

Seem too good to be true.

I admit I don’t blame the Grinch on hating the toys

As he emphasizes and we see all the noise, noise, noise, NOISE…

…they make.

(Hey, doing a whole review in rhyme ain’t easy.)

Still, these are some creative play things,

Requiring skill and imagination to make them all sing.

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Be honest, even you wanted at least one of these as a kid, whatever they are.

His dog Max pops up

With a beard made of snow

And in the Grinch’s head

An idea starts to grow.

In a Santa disguise

And a reindeer-dog sleigh,

He sneaks down to Whoville

To steal Christmas away!

To the mellifluous tones of Ravenscroft-Thurl,

The Grinch snatches treats from each Who boy and girl.

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And am I the only one who was curious about what Who-Hash tastes like?

He finds himself spotted by one Cindy-Lou

(Who I wanted to be ever since I was two).

Cindy-Lou is adorable, and June Foray sounds so sweet…

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…but where the hell are both her feet?!

The Grinch fools Cindy into going back to bed

And when all is done and said,

He finishes his rounds

Stealing Christmas all ’round town

The houses and square

Are empty and bare.

He rides to the tip of his mountain top

To let go of Christmas and watch it all drop

But over the snow comes the sound of the Whos

And they aren’t wailing or sobbing boo-hoos

They’re singing, though the Grinch doesn’t know why

And their song makes a star raise up to the sky.

The Grinch is quite sore that his plan didn’t work

But here’s where Chuck’s animation really gets to work.

In just a few seconds, it’s not at all strange

We see the Grinch undergo a three-size heart change.

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Awwwwwww. No seriously, awwwwwwwwwww.

With the spirit of Christmas at last understood,

The Grinch uses his super-Grinch strength for good.

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Or maybe he finally achieved godhood.

He’s welcomed into town where he brings back the feast,

The decorations, the toys, and he carves the roast beast.

Nearly fifty years later this short is still great

Its music and message still resonate.

And here’s a fun fact (or a funny ordeal)

Though this 30-minute animation won Seuss’ appeal,

He had one small complaint –

“Chuck Jones, you schnook!

The Grinch looks like YOU instead of like in the book!”

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Separated at birth?

Still, Jones’ animation and Seuss’ wordplay

Make this a must-see every holiday.

How much appeal has the Grinch?

This isn’t false or true-ish

My friend Brian loves it –

And he’s freaking Jewish!

 

Merry Christmas, my readers, or whatever you celebrate

I hope your holidays are heartwarming and great

May your days be filled with comfort and cheer

And I’ll be seeing you in the New Year!

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