Vote to Vindicate Virtue and Convict Virulent Villainy!

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Barack Obama, candidates, democrat, election day, end fascism, fuck fascism, fuck GOP, fuck republicans, fuck trump, joe biden, kamala harris, midterm election, midterm elections, midterms, save this country, speech, v for vendetta, vote, vote blue, vote blue 2022, vote blue down the ballot, vote democrat, vote now, vote out GOP, vote out republicans, voting rights

Remember and be wary
The sixth of January
Trump’s treasonous MAGA plot
I know of no reason
The violence and treason
Should ever be forgot…

Felicitations, my fine friends and fans. It is I, your verily vindictive and vociferous visualization of voting vendettas, Vhelf. As those of you in the USA are well aware of, today, November the 8th, is Election Day, and I appear before you once again with an urgent announcement.

It is no secret that our country is in a state of political turmoil spurred by the violent rhetoric of the former commander-in-chief and his treacherous lackeys. You may have heard that democracy balances on a knife’s edge – and that is unfortunately correct. This is a midterm, not a presidential election, yet the danger presented by the Republicans is no less dire.

If you’re unaware of the ramifications, then recall the terms of President Barack Obama. Change was promised, some changes were made, but most of our hopes were dashed by a Republican House and Senate hellbent on denying him the power to enact that change at every turn. In serving themselves over the will of the people and the Constitution they swore to uphold, they held open the doors for Trump, Pence, Greene, Barr, Cruz, Flynn, Conway, Barrett, Boebert, Walker, Bannon, Kavanaugh and their ilk. How did this happen? Well, there are those who will hopefully be held accountable in the days to follow, but the voters need only look into a mirror.

It is not enough to wait every four years to let yourself be heard. Change, especially positive change, is an engine requiring constant care and momentum to move forward. Foregoing midterms and primaries is what allows conservatives to seep through the cracks and siphon the energy that would otherwise power that change for their own selfish purposes.

Though pushing for that good change has felt slow, President Biden and many of the Democrats have come through on their assurances, especially during this tumultuous year. Student debts are being erased, COVID is falling under control, relief money has made its way into the hands of those who need it, hate crime bills were passed, Juneteenth is a recognized holiday, and a greater effort is being put into reversing climate change than ever before, among other noteworthy accomplishments.

All this was possible because of the overwhelming turnout at the polls in 2020. You did this.

And the Republicans have retaliated by ripping freedoms once thought untouchable out from underneath us. Roe vs. Wade? Gone. Now they’re openly discussing revoking social security and the right of same-sex marriage.

They have done all they could to stoke fear, from putting the rights of gun owners over the safety of children and educators, to calling for violence against political opponents and their families and making light of the suffering they inspired. Projecting their own failures on to Democrats has become a pastime, such as blaming them for inflation despite Republicans’ refusal to sign off on the Inflation Reduction Act. Gerrymandering, especially in red states, is still very much a thing. And of course, they continue to push the narrative that the election was “stolen” from Trump and deny their involvement in their vicious attempt to steal it for him.

Why? Why do they resort to continuously lower, spiteful actions? Because they are afraid of you.

They know the power you wield with your vote. Seeing the huge turnout against them and Trump two years ago terrified them, so much so that they incited and supported an insurrection so they could hold on to their power. By creating a climate of hopelessness and doubt, they hope to take back the Senate majority and regain the power to abuse the country as they saw fit during the previous administration.

Once again, however, they underestimate the intelligence, compassion and forward thinking of this new generation, and the lessons they and the previous ones have taken to heart while under the orange tyrant’s yoke.

We will not be swayed by fearmongering and falsehoods. We will not be indifferent to their greed, egos, lust for power, racism, misogyny and sycophantic obedience towards fascist orangutans. There is only one way to cast out these vipers, and that is to vote for the considerably progressive, peaceful and caring candidates all along the blue ballot.

To those of you who trekked to the polls in advance to cast your vote for a future favoring inclusivity, peace and justice, you have my heartiest thanks and gratitude. To the rest who are either going there today or are currently sitting on the fence –

Vote blue.

Vote blue so your daughters and wives and sisters and mothers will regain control of their own bodies.

Vote blue for the clean skies and waters to remain that hue.

Vote blue to keep books and history pertaining to more colors than white within schools.

Vote blue to defend marriage for everyone on the LGBTQA+ spectrum.

Vote blue to protect immigrants from being treated as criminals or cattle.

Vote blue to keep the social security that you, your parents and grandparents worked so hard to build.

Vote blue to recognize transgender rights as human rights.

Vote blue to see the traitors who believed they could overthrow 200 years of democratic process face the consequences of their actions.

Vote blue, because if we don’t, it’s likely that we’ll be seeing nothing but red for a very, very long time.

I hope to see you again in a world where heaven is blue, and tomorrow the world. Until then, I shall leave you with this uplifting message from one of the greatest animated films of all time:

Now we are not afraid
Although we know there’s much to fear
We were moving mountains long before we knew we could.

Faerie Tale Theatre Reviews: The Three Little Pigs

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1980's, 80s, Big Bad Wolf, Billy Crystal, blow the house down, brick house, Comedy, coyotes, Disney, disney animated short, Doris Roberts, english fairy tale, Faerie Tale Theatre, fairy tale, fairy tale adaptation, fairy tale origins, fairy tales, fairytale, Fantasy, Fred Willard, huff and puff, jeff goldblum, not by the hair on my chinny chin chin, pig, pigs, review, shelley duvall, Stephen Furst, stick house, straw house, straw sticks bricks, television, television review, three little pigs, tv review, Valerie Perrine, wolf, wolves

“Okay listen up because I’m only gonna say this once: open the door…or I’m gonna huff and I’m gonna puff and I’m gonna…blow your house in, whaddaya think of that?”
– The Big Bad Wolf’s ultimatum, as delivered by the only actor who could do it justice

All right, we’ve finally come to an episode many of you have been waiting for. For some fans this is peak Faerie Tale Theatre, and I agree with them. This outing has everything: a funderful cast (my way of saying fun+wonderful), clever writing, and humor coming out the wazoo. You’re in for a treat.

But first, the obligatory story behind the story.

This is another English fairytale brought to us by folklorist Joseph Jacobs in 1890, four years before he published his findings on Goldilocks and the Three Bears’ origins. Jacobs credited fellow nursery rhyme collector James Halliwell-Phillips as the source of The Three Little Pigs story. The earliest known version has a very different cast from the one we know: instead of three pigs and a wolf, it’s three pixies and a fox, and their houses were made of wood, stone and iron rather than straw, sticks and bricks. The reason behind the changes in the definitive English version are unclear; one theory is that the divergence comes from someone mishearing the word “pixie” as “pigsie”.

The fable has a few international variations, though much less than what I’ve come to expect doing this research each month. Italian retellings dating from the same era Jacobs published his story replace the pigs with geese. The one Joel Chandler Harris recorded in his collection of Uncle Remus tales appropriation of African mythology has six pigs instead of three. The one consistent theme running through them all is the moral of hard work, resourcefulness and careful planning paying off.

That’s not to say this story has some underlying darkness to it. In some iterations, even the perspective-flipped The True Story of the Three Little Pigs by Jon Scieszka, the wolf eats the first two pigs after blowing down their houses. The original fairytale also ends with the third little pig tricking the wolf, killing and eating him instead! This has been toned down in future retellings, understandably so. Regardless, the rule of three in effect as well as the fun nonsense phrases like “not by the hair on my chinny-chin-chin” has helped this tale remain a memorable one. Now, let’s see how Faerie Tale Theatre puts their spin on it.